Hard to leave him.

I'm constantly leaving him. Driving him to daycare. Putting him to bed at night. And on the weekends; down for his naps. I'm constantly leaving him. So leaving him any additional time is hard. The guilt sets in almost immediately. I can hype myself up for whatever event or task I have planned. I can talk myself out of the sadness for a bit...but, then...like a slow punch to the gut it hits me. A constant  nudge bringing my mind to him. Is he happy, is he ok, does he need something? It doesn't stop.

It's exhausting. The worry. Oh the damn worries! This was nothing I was ever warned of. Sure, I was told I'd worry. But, no one, in no way, warned me of this.